The Decision

In my life I have made many decisions. Some good and some bad. The decision to put my head between the railings on the staircase when I was 4...bad. The decision to become a nanny....good. Everyday is full of thousands decisions that are made without much thought to consequences and I am guilty most of the time of running headlong into decisions that haven't always been the best, even though my intentions were good. So in September of 2009 I made the decision of moving to Idaho to help care for my 79 year old Grandmother. Was this right? Was this wrong? I still don't know, but nonetheless, I made a decision. Weeks preceeding the move I thought of all the great memories of Idaho, my own personal Tara when growing up was difficult, mostly about the time I spent with my beloved Grandfather. However, in the stark reality of this life, my Grandfather is dead, and the memories are just that, memories. In the frustration of wondering why my Grandmother stays in her cleaverly crafted memories came the realization that I too am guilty of the same offense and it is time to wake up. It is time to put the past in the past and look to the future. I made this decision and I will stand up straight, square my shoulders and move forward.