New Start

It's been a very interesting and frustrating and amazing couple of months.  Life continues to come at me from all sides, but I'm trying (like everyone else) to enjoy the journey.  I think the decision to go through the Temple has not been an easy one and this past week I almost got so far off the track from that goal that I have had to stop and reevaluate everything.  

I don't understand why more people don't do a weekly self-correction reflection because it continues to help me in my journey to understand what is acceptable and what is not.  While self-correction is never easy, it is worth it in the end. 

I said "Good bye" to a few behaviors and a few people who add to the confusion of my life.  Change is hard and life is hard, but one step at a time.....right?!?

I gave notice at my job, and my last day will be June 30th for full time work.  I will work part time here and there until I am secure in another job and the girls will be able to transition into a new nanny or daycare.  I would like to leave the world of nannies; it's a difficult job with a lot of the issues being the parents and seldom the children.  I love the girls and will miss them terribly.  June 30th will be a painful day indeed!

I also changed my major to nutrition.  I think it will be very helpful for medical school down the road and it is something that I am interested in.  I think this will be a good fit and I'm excited about this new direction.

I have also begun part time work for "Seeing The Everyday" magazine.  I help with the social media and will take on more responsibilities as I end the nanny job and move into secretarial work.  I am excited to work for a magazine that "get's it".  It promotes the power of "Seeing the worth and value in everyday" moments, or in other words, the prosaics of life.  It is one of the most life changing magazines (blessedly ad free by the way) that I have ever read.  There is something so special about it that I have to read it cover to cover when a new issue comes out.  It is a source of comfort and strength and reminds me of what is truly important and that nothing is ever really mundane.  If you have time, check out their blog.  blog.seeingtheeveryday.com  

Looking for housing in Boston is also on the list of things to do, but like everything else, it will just take time.  I'm hoping to stay here and figure out a few things before moving on to my next adventure.  There are amazing people here in Boston and I'm learning a lot. 

In about a week, I will turn 31.  For my gift to myself, I am taking a year off to just be happy.  To stop and really be joyously happy.  I'm sure I'll start a blog about it or something.  I am committed to 365 days of happiness with no guilt or explanations to anyone......I'm excited about my 31st year.  I'll probably do crazy things like go grocery shopping with an eye patch because I feel like being a pirate, or buy a kilt and dance in my (future) kitchen!!!  Who knows!  It will be one grand adventure! 

I'm looking forward to the new "me" and all these dreams and adventures!

New Year, New Dream & Correct Principles.

So, it is well into February of 2012. I have set some very serious goals this year and will achieve most of them....mainly because I now have hope. It seems every year that I make goals, I achieve one or two, but not all of them and then end my year feeling as if I have failed yet again. Well this year just feels different.
I have been blessed with amazing friends and family members who are going out of their way to pray for me and guide me with their counsel. I am really blessed by this gift and am thankful for it at every level.
I made some big changes this year. I returned from visiting family in Utah by train, which enabled me to think about things for 63 hours.
I changed my major to pre med and will hopefully be accepted into medical school by the end of next year. In the meantime, I am taking a lot of medical classes and finishing up my requirements. I hope to have this accomplished by the end of this year. I bought a new computer, and have a goal to pay off five bills this year and save a significant portion of my income.
I also have the same goal to maximize my efforts to acquiring a healthy lifestyle. This is the hardest of all as I am such an emotionally driven person, but hopefully this year will be different.
I also have a goal that I am so excited about, but will not share it openly because it is very private and sacred to me. I am working on my relationship with God and am trying to make it the top relationship that I improve for this year and all the rest to follow.
Work is still good, the twins continue to grow and change. They are relentless in their destruction and so glorious in their absolute joy that they share with everyone around them. It's like watching two cyclones move through the room and at the same time enjoying every second. They are marvelous and are absolutely two beautiful blessings in my life.
I have to start to look at different colleges for next year and hopefully I can accomplish this quickly.
I would like to travel this year; I was so blessed last year to go to Scotland and Germany twice. Maybe Nova Scotia for my birthday this year.....or Maine....who knows.
Either way, whatever I do and whatever this year has in store, I am trying to put the Lord first and realize the bigger picture, to have hope and trust in my Savior as I move forward and try to live my life based on correct principles.

Keep Moving Forward

It's been along time since I updated this blog. Mostly because I have been in school and was very busy. Many wonderful things have happened since I last blogged. I was able to go to Germany twice. To spend Christmas with my beautiful friend Nadja, and the last time to go to her wedding to Jordan. They are the perfect couple and so adorable and it was one of the loveliest moments in my life to see my friend

so incredibly and completely happy. Work finally ironed itself out and my employer found a job and has gone back to work. I have to say, the house is empty without her and the girls miss her.

I survived this last semester with barely a nerve left in tact, only to be diagnosed with a very scary diagnosis by my OBGYN. It would be so easy to feel sorry for myself, and in some aspects, I allowed myself that privilege for a short amount of time. However, after careful contemplation, it will do nothing for me to stress out over something that is not in my control. So, here I am, more calm than I usually am and I have to say, it's a little odd.

It is also Easter weekend, and as such, I am missing my family and have spent my Easter day at church and then watching Disney movies because I have nothing left to do on a Sunday. (Well, nothing seems appealing, there are plenty of things to do, but I have no desire to do them) So while slowly aging in the chair in the living room, one of my favorite movies came on. Meet the Robinson's. The point of this movie is to "Keep Moving Forward" and suddenly, it took on a whole new meaning. With all that is going on; all I have to do is keep moving forward. I cannot stop the diagnosis given, I cannot control what is happening in my body or the way life occurs to some degree. The only thing I need to do is "keep moving forward" and to do the next right thing.

One way or another, life will continue to go on, and if I make right choices, eventually, I will become the woman I would like to be. It is not possible to know the end from the beginning, but I know what I can control and what I can't. The "Serenity" prayer say's: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference". Amen.

Two Fabulous Weeks

I love my Mom! I do, she is the best. We have been through a lot and have come out as good friends. So as time got closer for Mom to visit, I became more anxious. Then the day arrived and I was so happy. As usual I cried at Boston's Logan Airport when I saw her come down the stairs. It was wonderful to see her. After we got her home, and rested up, the next day, we went to Boston's Museum of Fine Arts. We had a great time and Mom got to ride on the T for the first time with her own Charlie card!

Friday was the day that Kelly and Mike had given me off, so we ran up to Ogonquit Maine and then down to Salem, Mass., up to Gloucester and finished up the day with a little shopping in Rockport, Massachusetts. It was Mom's first time in the Atlantic Ocean and she loved every second of it. I enjoyed just spending time with her as we collected seashells along the beach.

Saturday was spent shopping and doing parts of the Freedom Trail. Little Italy and China town, as well as Charlestown on Sunday. We had such a great time that when Monday came, I was heartsick to say goodbye to her. After dropping her off at the airport, the twins were crying in the back and I was crying in the front.

However, on the 1st of July, Kelly, the Twins: Maya and Anjuli and Myself all flew out to Seattle. I spent the night in Seatac....Never Again People.....Never again, or at least not at the Sutton Suites. A friend came and we had a picnic indoors as it rained and played Phase 10. After an odd's night sleep, I flew home to Utah on July 2, 2010. It was so nice to see my family.

No matter what, family means everything to me. My sister had just had a baby boy in May and he was sure a handsome little guy. So tiny and adorable. I thought he'd look a little like his Mom, but I saw a lot of Erick in him. Ryker was blessed July 4th and he was such a great little guy for being passed around that much.

July 5th, I had breakfast with my oldest sister. It was nice to have that time to catch up and talk. I miss her very much. Of anyone besides my Mom, she knows me the best. After breakfast and a quick oil change, I met with my German Professor Ericka Daines at Weber University, we had a pleasant interview and then I drove home in time to see the end of the water fight. We all had a great time, I bought fireworks as well as Erick and Heather, we all had a great time.

July 6th I said goodbye to my Grandma and Aunt who had come down from Idaho for the baby blessing, then spent the morning taking a math test, and meeting with the rest of my future professors. It was a busy day. After that was finished, I ran to the store to buy cupcake mix and dinner for Corri and Richard's family as I promised Danni that we would cook and bake. We started our own blog, called flutterbuttcakes.blogspot.com., check it out if you have free time. She is a great cook. I ran home that night, picked up my Mom, saw my Brother's new house and their family, then off to say goodbye to Heather and Erick and Ryker.

July 7th was hard to say goodbye to my family. I miss them so much. I got on a plane and headed back to Seattle where I caught a shuttle called the Belair Shuttle up to Bennington WA. Kelly's dad picked me up and gave me a tour of the towns as we drove to La Connor where they live. Up on Shelter Bay which is on an Indian Reservation. Their house was great with a huge deck that the twins had fun playing on. They were very nice and hospitable.

July 8th was spent in Washington State Park and then I spent the afternoon in La Connor. It is a great little artsy town.

July 9th I took the Anacortes Ferry to Sidney British Columbia where I then took a bus to Butchart Gardens.....Breathtaking....simply Breathtaking! It was a wonderful day. Full of fun and new sights. I really spoiled myself and had afternoon tea in the Dining room, right outside of the Rose Garden. It was a day I will always remember.

July 10th, we: Kelly, Maya, Anjuli and Myself were driven back to the airport by Kelly's parents, where we flew home to Boston on Jet Blue. What a vacation! It truly has been marvelous to see such beautiful things and get to experience the fun of family, Seattle, Canada, and all that I have experienced. Washington is a beautiful state, and the views were amazing. Now back to Boston, Vacation is over and it's time to focus and get back to work!

Me Time!

Sorry for not staying consistent with this blog, but with 6 month old twins, my hands are often full! So now as the weather is starting to improve, I have gotten out a little more and seen new and exciting things. I joined a book club at the Brookline Booksmith, which is fun, we are reading Rudyard Kipling's "Kim". In the past few weeks, I have also explored more and I must say: I LOVE BOSTON! There is so much to do and see and eat!!! Needless to say all diets flew out the window when I learned of Chau Chow City's Dim Sum in Chinatown!!! So delicious. The familiar tastes exploded in my mouth and I was instantly reminded of great times with my old boss and friend Chris Chen and all the food we ate in Ohio and in Salt Lake. Today was the start of a 3 day weekend for me. I choose to explore Hanover street and Salem Street in the North End which is Boston's Little Italy. Besides a million pastry shops and Gelato stops and Restaurants, I was quite comfortable with the atmosphere and enjoyed taking my time wandering through shops, and streets. I even had my own 40 minute conversation with a total stranger which was fun. Lunch was spent at Cantina Italiana.....home made Gnocchi, which just melted in my mouth and was so light and delicious I can still close my eyes and smell those little potato bites from heaven! Of course I couldn't let dessert pass me by, (yes, I gave into my weakness for Tiramisu) which was beyond words and so Fantastico!
All in all, not a bad few weeks, I took a Sushi making class at Sea To You Sushi and surprised even myself with how professional my Maki rolls looked.
Anjuli and Maya continue to grow and amaze me with how quickly they learn new milestones! Ever adorable and full of energy, they keep me on my toes and I enjoy every minute with them.
Wednesday nights continue to be my saving grace as I am a faithful student of Restorative Yoga at the South Boston Yoga Studio. My instructor is amazing and I feel renewed every Wednesday! Yay for Yoga!
All of these experiences just serve to remind me how lucky and blessed I am. I am reminded of gratitude. Gratitude for life, family, friends, good food, and the ability to have these experiences!

Resolution I

When the new year rang in I did what every other person decides to do: New Year's Resolutions. I made a list of 6 or 7 things I wanted to accomplish this year. So far, I have completed one and I am so very happy to have completed it. Resolution I: Move to Boston. With sadness in my heart (leaving family) and a fresh new outlook, I flew to Boston on a red eye and arrived in my new city with excitement and exhaustion (thanks to the man that just had to read through the red eye..who by the way was sitting next to me). I survivied my first week of having a cold, and I have just completed my 2nd week of work as well as my first day alone with Maya and Anjuli. My employers are very kind and very open and I couldn't be happier. A free yoga class this last weekend and a new hair style has convinced me that yes, this is a great place to be and anything is possible. I have survived my first driving experience, my first "T" ride, and even my first yoga class. RESOLUTION I is complete. I have moved! One down, five or six more to go. What a great time to be alive!

Preparation

Before one embarks on any task there has to be a certain amount of preparation. Before one runs a marathon, one prepares physically and mentally. Before one cooks a souffle, one must prepare the oven and ingredients. So must I too prepare. I am about to embark on the next exciting chapter of my life: Boston. As I close the chapter on the last ten years, I hope to let go of the bad and rejoice in the good times; the memories I will always treasure and the lessons learned. In just a few days we will all be in a new year and starting a new decade....how prepared are we? What will I prepare for? I, myself, will prepare to stick a bandaid on the cuts and bruises of the past and hopefully keep going on. I will prepare to put myself out there to experience all that life has to offer; to change incorrect views, to be more kind to the people I cherish, and to be more accepting of others' differences. To be happy in silence and make more positive and lasting relationships. To not be a door mat for those who would walk all over me and to make my peace with all that there is. To look in the mirror and accept the person looking back at me. So how do I prepare? One step at a time; with Gratitude and an Open Heart and Mind. I hope that we can all forgive, move forward, and reach our full potential for the next decade in our lives. I don't know about you, but I have a lot of preparation to do, so I better get busy! To the New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!